Sunday, April 29, 2018

Living the dream

My good friend Clint Green is moving to Phoenix. He has had the odd notion of living there and feeds that desire by numerous visits back to the arid, hot, waterless wasteland to run on trailz with no rocks, grass with no ticks, and with friends with no beer. (Ok, I might have made that last part up.)

Clint is a beer connoisseur. He drinks all kinds of beer--you name it--as long as it's PBR. He drinks them chilled, frozen, lukewarm, and even ones that have been rattling around in the floorboard of the back seat during the summer. He is equally skilled chugging PBRs with his left AND right hand. And talk about being a fashion trendsetter--notice how his beer can matches his hat!!

Sometimes though, Clint feels a need to get in touch with his feminine side and he'll kill a sixpack of Angry Orchard--usually with PBR chasers.

Truthfully (a word rarely associated with anything I say) Clint had a ton of friends. He just seemed like everyone's brother. Dude was easy to talk to, and he was a perfect running buddy for anyone regardless of their speed. Somehow, he could stay up with the skinny bearded shirtless wonders (SBSWs.) He was a great leader of the slow group, and half of the time he'd cop out saying he was not running until his hip, or knee or, ankle, or sore vajayjay was not hurting--but then he'd still belt out a speedy 8 miles on the trailz complete with 1900 feet of elevation gain. 

Well, it was decided by the TOTs/Dirtbags that Clint owed us a 50K at the Chandler Wilds--the FU50K. This area in west Tulsa is some of the toughest terrains in the area, and only the tough and fearless ever ventured out into the virtually unexplored wilderness. I have occasionally run out there and know the area well enough that I can usually find my way back out on the same calendar day. True to form, Clint pointed the blame to the "injury of the day" and admitted that there was no way he could do 31 miles out there, so the CAB25K was conceived. (CAB = Clint's A Bitch.) The picture above was a sampling of the 20 +/- friends who came out to the CAB Good Riddance Run.

Only a few of the SBSWs knew the wilds well enough to create a loop that could be navigated for a 25K completion, and they marked the turns with pink ribbon slivers and old beer cans as they drank them along the way, with a start and hopeful finish in the TCC parking lot.

With a 7:09 sharp start, we took off into the thicket. Kathy was gonna run with me and I called her right at 7:00 to see if she was on her way, and she had overslept. Kathy is someone who can wake up and be ready to run in minutes, and 40 minutes later, she was up, dressed, and had driven the 17 miles to where we were. I ran a little on the course with the starters, and then came back to meet her.

We ran along at an easy pace, sometimes bombing the downhills, and shuffling up the climbs. We also did a fair share of walking. About 3 miles into the route, we saw runners coming the other way, and I knew something was amiss. Of course, I thought they had made a wrong turn, but eventually, it sunk in that I had missed a turn.

So, using my keen navigational expertise, I found a way to correct our dilemma--CHEATING. Climbing up this slot passage put us atop a bluff, and we could access the trail that put us back on course. We also managed to lop off a mile and a half of our journey. We did get to enjoy some glorious trailz, some good running, some mud, some trailz that were actually a creek, and some more mud.

Looking at the map, which looks like a running turkey, we bypassed the back leg and one of the back tail feathers. When we finally hit the Powerline, we traversed and lopped off the front tail feather and the head.

Looking back to the west after having climbed over 200 feet in less than .2 of a mile, I felt energized and considered running back and doing it all over again. Yeah right!!

Instead, we did a selfie where we look like giants and went on to the finish. Kathy and I had 8.3 miles and 1100 feet of elevation gain. Congrats to all who started and finished. You are better people than me.

Clint was sitting around, enjoying a beer. and reading his going away card, and a couple of other parting gifts bought for him.

Jwalk had arranged the collection of funds and had bought this  Big Agnes C Bar tent. A lot of us signed the tent so he won't completely forget all his friends who love him and are sad that he's gone.

I found this Clint Green quote on his Facebook page. It sums his pathetic life up pretty well.  

Road trips to trails leading to amazing scenery. That's all I want in life.
So next week--he is leaving out on Monday--Clint will be living his dream in Aridzona. (I miss you already, my brother.)

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